There was a time when I was feared. Fellow students would cringe at the thought of showing me their work, and cower during peer reviews. Okay — maybe it wasn’t that bad. But they did make snarky comments when it was my turn to weigh in on their work. At first, I thought it was because of my blunt manner and the fact that I cut to the heart of the issue. But I realized, as time went on, that it was because I wasn’t giving criticism as effectively as I could have.

I’m not at all saying that bluntness is a bad thing. That’s just a nuance in character. One of my favorite professors from design school would walk up and call my uppercase “O” a lemon and draw a stem with leaves on it. He would take someone’s calligraphy project, rip it up, and call it garbage if he thought he was right. And the funny thing is… he always was. He knew good design.  My friends and I couldn’t win an argument with him when it came to design technique and fundamentals. And we loved it. His critiques were often extreme, full of character and on point… and we always wanted his opinion.

While my former professor’s critiques were effective because of their ridiculous deliveries, your critique doesn’t need to be extreme (unless that’s how you roll) — it just needs to be constructive. The following are a few tips to improve communication while you give criticism.

THE APPROACH
Take stock of your attitude. Are you in a bad mood? Bitter? Or just negative in general? When someone comes to you for critique they are looking for valuable feedback. How can you give their work the consideration it deserves when you’re preoccupied with that speeding ticket you got earlier in the day?

Ask yourself if you’re the right person to be giving feedback. We all love sharing an opinion or two, but if you don’t have anything else to add to the conversation besides “Looks good,” you may not be the best person for the job. Think about who you could put in contact with your designer to get them some constructive criticism.

Put down the iPhone. Close your laptop. Pay attention. Giving good feedback starts with being involved and engaged. If you’re distracted, you won’t be giving feedback that’s helpful.

Understand the project. Good advice is advice that helps the project get closer to the goal. This is only possible if you know the intention and purpose of the project. Make sure it’s clearly explained to you before you dive in to the critique.

THE CRITIQUE
Be specific. Don’t say “That logo is stupid” or “I don’t like that color.” Be clear and logical, rather than vague and confusing. Back your opinions up with tangible reasons.

Ask questions. Understanding why the designer did what he did could help you see his vision more clearly, or uncover hard-to-find flaws in his logic. Heck, you might even learn a thing or two.

Be unbiased. Don’t put someone down to make yourself feel better. Don’t sabotage someone’s project. Stuff like that breaks the unspoken rules between designers. If someone respects you enough to ask for your help, respect his work enough to give it an honest, appropriate, well-tempered critique.

Give a next step. Your advice should give the designer a clearer view of the project and its objectives, or even a new concept or path to follow.  Maybe you could offer up a relevant book or blog to strengthen his skills in specific areas.

THE RESPONSE
Listen. After you give your opinion, be ready to listen to why your designer might agree or disagree. Critique is fun when it’s a two-way street. Let him enter into the conversation freely.

Check back in. If you’re available or have a few minutes to see how the project has improved, why not ask to see it? Knowing how your advice came across and whether it was helpful will let you know if your critiques are improving.

I hope you find these suggestions helpful. If you need practice, get together with friends and host a portfolio day. Take turns giving and receiving suggestions. One of the best ways to learn about giving critique is to get critiqued. Listen to what people are saying as they discuss your work and think about how it affects you. Is it harsh? Helpful? Smart? Vague? As you practice, your communication skills will improve, making you a better designer. This sounds like a win for everyone involved.